[This prick! Pretending he can't fucking read. Next time he sees Esikko, he's gonna brain him with whatever's on hand, dammit!]
That dog's gone home too? Fuck.
[Akira, Ryuji, Yusuke, Yato, Hiyori, Jun... Now Shigaraki. Bakugo grinds his fingers into his palm, explosions bursting and blasting out of sheer venting over empty air. It makes him wonder what the fucking point is. He's no idiot. Getting close to anyone runs the risk of them vanishing. He's a hero, dammit! Every time one of them goes out, they risk their lives. They might never see each other again! ... But for some reason, it hits harder here. And he hates it.]
Bonding with anyone is always a risk. But living alone fucking sucks.
[He'll talk with him. It irritates him he heard the news from someone else. Not because he expected Dabi to come tell him, but because it feels weird to approach someone about private shit you heard elsewhere. Like some damn sneak skulking around for gossip. Che...]
I'll look into it.
If it's the 24 - 26, tell him ahead of time. That guy has other people who care about him.
[Running over someone else's time spent isn't gonna help any of them.]
( The secret is that he loves rough housing, despite his health, so that would definitely start a war (that he would lose).
As for bonding being a risk... )
I used to avoid getting close to people because it felt weak, or dangerous. It still does, I guess. But I'd rather never go back to being alone.
( Even if he feels like an idiot typing all of that out, ugh. Feelings suck sometimes. )
Anyway, I know what you mean, but the problem is that's what everyone who cares about him ends up thinking, isn't it? And his boyfriend is notoriously bad at giving him the attention he needs, to the point where I think it's getting actively harmful.
I'm not saying this for you to worry about his personal business or feel like you're interfering, for the record. I'm just trying to help.
[He would end Esikko in a flash. Bakugo's never been one for rough housing... for long. He tries ending his skirmishes as fast and definitive as possible, so he can lord over his foolish opponent how utterly outclassed they are.
It's more humiliating that way and he lives for his victory. So bring it on, Esikko!]
Yeah, I know. It's always dangerous. Many heroes never date or marry because of that. Anyone who gets close to a hero, or a villain, is at risk. Someone one else becomes your weakness.
[And not only do you have to live with that weakness, the other person ends up wrestling with guilt and shame over being the weak link of the person they care about. It's stupid, it's foolish, and humans do it all the time. Even when they know better.]
Oy. Don't gossip at me.
[Bakugo... does not like Fuuta. They've never gotten along, and now actively avoid each other. He has his own opinions on whether Fuuta's good for Dabi or not. But it's because of that, and how much Bakugo cares about the other man, that he eschews interactions regarding those two's relationship. Dabi's business.]
He's not an idiot. He chose to be with him. Respect his decision.
[The resort doesn't need to get any ideas. Bakugo doesn't need any ideas. He's already wrangled his feelings enough, including ones he shouldn't admit, even in his head.]
Are you one of those heroes? Who'd never get too close?
( Esikko hates Fuuta's guts, and has made it outwardly clear from the start— fist fighting him in Dabi's kitchen wasn't the best way he could have gone about it, granted, but as soon as he realized Dabi actually cared about the guy, he held himself back. More and more, he felt like he was holding back— he'd pull Fuuta aside and chew him out for certain decisions, definitely not minding his own business, but he thinks he can't be blamed for that sort of thing. Is it so wrong, to care about someone enough to get involved?
He wishes he could be as hands-off with it as Bakugo. It's just too hard. )
I'm not trying to gossip. He chose it, and I've bitten my tongue in plenty of places and ways, you know, but I can't sit idly by while he takes that idiot's actions or words to mean he's worthless. You know? That's all.
If I didn't respect it, or him, I would be interfering. But I'm not doing that. I'm just saying, he might end up alone on that day if we leave it to others.
( He typed so many more names and insults initially but went back and cleaned it up. He tries so hard to not be mean, but... The inner anger sparks. )
I just want him to know what it feels like. Being cared about, when you expect to be forgotten. Having people be a little selfish in wanting his company. He and I are similar in this way, at least I think.
[Stupid question. If he was a hero who never got too close, he wouldn't be having this conversation with Esikko in the first place! A year ago, back home, he'd answer with a resounding "No!" but now... He's learned the pitfalls of traveling a hero's life alone.
By the time Bakugo admitted shit to himself, Esikko and Fuuta were closer, so he simply accepted his place on the side. He's never been one to get involved with other people's personal relationships. Annoying business. Their lives, their choices. He'll give his opinions if he feels it necessary. So far, he's not felt it.
He's seen people do fucking stupid things in the name of "caring" about someone. Heroes often stick their noses in other people's business on principle. But there's a difference between caring about someone and potentially sabotaging what they have. It's a fine line verging on jealousy.
He feels what he feels and told the man as much. It's not always easy, but he'll be content with what he has rather than erode himself pining after what he doesn't.]
That guy can twist anything into self-depreciating.
We're not leaving it to others, idiot. That's why I told you to bring it up to him. Don't say what you're gonna do. [Leaving it a surprise. Dabi already suspects people are going to want to do things with him; he's down on himself pessimistic, not a fool.] He isn't gonna spend that day alone.
[Whether it's them or someone else being with him.]
Huh? Why the hell do you think he doesn't know what all that feels like?
( There's a bit of a pause here, as Esikko thinks of how to respond. First, a bit of relief at Bakugo saying he'll just cover his weaknesses. It would be lonely, he thinks, to write off closeness entirely, so it's nice to hear he hasn't. Second, the self-deprecation issue... is one he understands well, considering how he is himself.
He considers the idea of running it vaguely by Dabi, the idea of him trying to close away from it, or say he doesn't need it. But as long as he doesn't leave options for that, and just says what's going to happen, it should be fine, right? He can pick the day. )
Because I've spoken to him about this sort of thing.
And because, I think, the cruel words stick longer. Even if he's felt it before, we'll just have to beat him over the head with it again~ Right?
I'll run it by him to find the best date, but keep your involvement and the activities a surprise, maybe?
[He's accepted he's made friends. There are people back home and in this stupid world who he cares about and would fight to the bitter end to keep safe. Denying it (he will, vocally, most times) is pretty easy for anyone who knows him to see through. But he's gotta keep that tough guy image! Not even his friends can take advantage of him! So he says... No, he's unable to write off those close to him anymore.
As for self-depreciation, he's handled plenty from the villain. When Bakugo said he didn't want people knowing about his feelings for Dabi, the man instantly asked if it was because Bakugo was embarrassed of him. ... What the hell?! He's repeatedly reaffirmed his loyalty and protectiveness, stuck with him and bared pieces of himself. Yet so often Dabi remains at arm's length, never entirely trusting his words, always quick to assume the problem or worthlessness is him, never allowing himself the chance to believe someone actually cares about him... for him.
Bakugo's come to accept that as well. Damaged too deep. Of course he wants to save Dabi. Not as a hero, but as a friend. Yet he's been forced to realize, some people simply don't want to be saved. They stopped believing they can be, or deserve to be. So Bakugo leaves his hand in the fire, letting it burn to a blackened skeleton. Ready. Waiting. Even if Dabi never reaches out to truly take his hand... and least it will always be there for him.
Just in case.
That's how he's chosen to love him.
Anyways, Esikko has the right idea on how to handle this. No choice, no options. Dump it right on his doorstep and tell him it's coming. They can knock him off his feet later on the day of their choosing. And make sure Dabi's not alone for the holidays. (Unless he wants to be. Bakugo's not gonna shove himself into the man's life when he needs some fucking personal space. He would be pissed if people dragged him to parties and shit too.) It'll be fine.]
No shit. Don't underestimate everything you've done for him in the past. Some people won't admit they feel good because they're scared it'll stop if they do. That bastard's stubborn as fuck even if you cram proof down his throat.
[So they'll keep cramming.]
Fine. When we do this, we're gonna make sure he's so fucking stuffed he explodes!
[You know, stuffed with care, but hell if he's gonna say something that stupid sappy!]
( Esikko's love for Dabi takes its own angle, loud and selfish. The sort of insistence that allows no room for doubt, that embarrasses and causes trouble and twists itself around things and gets in the way, that doesn't leave any room for shying back or away. He's felt that same reluctance from Dabi, the refusal to take his hand— and even if Esikko is far more the type to reach out and grab it forcefully anyway, he's not one to drag him anywhere he doesn't want to go. He'll be annoying, he'll be sappy, he'll say all the things he feels are worth saying.
He's seen that Bakugo and Dabi are close in a similar way. More history, but the same reluctance to accept a hand extended his way. Bakugo's extended hand is warm and consistent, and by recognizing that, maybe that's why he doesn't feel the pang of jealousy from watching those two get along that he does when he hears Dabi speaking about Fuuta...? Maybe it's because he trusts Bakugo, or because he's fond of him more each day, too, or because he's a far more reliable presence. Or maybe it's just because with the different ways they offer love, it feels like he could still have a place himself alongside either of them. He tries not to think about it too much.
It's nice hearing from him those affirmations that Dabi is always too embarrassed to give, though. That he's done things for him, or impacted him in some positive way... That it's been noticed at all. So after a pause, he replies. )
I knew I could count on you for this. Thanks, Katsuki.
( It's going to be fun. It's probably going to end up in a christmas bang. )
That's the spirit~ Let's set off our own big firework, hehe. I'll let you know what day it's going to be, and we can stay in contact about setup.
[Normally it's not in Bakugo's nature to be reserved or hold back. He always thought, on the off chance he ever did want to get in a relationship, it'd go one of two ways. One, the other person would have the balls to come up and tell him to his face. Wishywashy non-committal half-hearted bullshit's not gonna get anywhere from him. Would he yell at them for being so forward? Probably, if they caught him off guard. Two, he'd be the one bluntly saying he liked them and letting the victim do with the information what they would. "Hey shitty extra, let's go out." Would he be red-faced and flustered about it? .... HE FUCKING HOPES NOT!
Ironically it's far easier for him to talk about someone else's feelings than his own. Those are private. If Esikko can't tell his previous actions and presence around the villain are appreciated, that's on his own pessimistic nature. Both prince and villain are similar, never believing either of them is worth someone else's time or care. Dismissing kindness with doubt or guilt or cynicism. How people can get through their lives not giving a shit about themselves is something Bakugo will never relate to. He's always been proud of himself and valued his own worth, screw what anyone else thinks! He'll make them think he's worth it! Even if that means smashing them in the face with proof.]
Hmph. As if I'd give you shitty advice.
[He'll let things play out. Dabi likes going to parties and getting lost in hedonism. Might be a good change of pace to kick back and do fuck all with his friends.]
Big talk. Let's put some real stakes out there, then?
A number of games for me to learn, and once I've learned, we set a number of matches to be called the "winner." If I win, I get to pick something for you to wear.
I wouldn't worry about that. You're part of the surprise. Let me put a little ribbon on those spikes of yours.
But really, I didn't say it would be just me, but I didn't say you'd be there, either. I said I had plans for him. It's vague enough he should expect more than just some solo date, since he knows me well.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 12/4/25 19:15 (UTC)[This prick! Pretending he can't fucking read. Next time he sees Esikko, he's gonna brain him with whatever's on hand, dammit!]
That dog's gone home too? Fuck.
[Akira, Ryuji, Yusuke, Yato, Hiyori, Jun... Now Shigaraki. Bakugo grinds his fingers into his palm, explosions bursting and blasting out of sheer venting over empty air. It makes him wonder what the fucking point is. He's no idiot. Getting close to anyone runs the risk of them vanishing. He's a hero, dammit! Every time one of them goes out, they risk their lives. They might never see each other again! ... But for some reason, it hits harder here. And he hates it.]
Bonding with anyone is always a risk. But living alone fucking sucks.
[He'll talk with him. It irritates him he heard the news from someone else. Not because he expected Dabi to come tell him, but because it feels weird to approach someone about private shit you heard elsewhere. Like some damn sneak skulking around for gossip. Che...]
I'll look into it.
If it's the 24 - 26, tell him ahead of time. That guy has other people who care about him.
[Running over someone else's time spent isn't gonna help any of them.]
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Date: 12/4/25 19:30 (UTC)As for bonding being a risk... )
I used to avoid getting close to people because it felt weak, or dangerous. It still does, I guess. But I'd rather never go back to being alone.
( Even if he feels like an idiot typing all of that out, ugh. Feelings suck sometimes. )
Anyway, I know what you mean, but the problem is that's what everyone who cares about him ends up thinking, isn't it? And his boyfriend is notoriously bad at giving him the attention he needs, to the point where I think it's getting actively harmful.
I'm not saying this for you to worry about his personal business or feel like you're interfering, for the record. I'm just trying to help.
So, we can do the 23rd if you feel that's easier.
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Date: 12/4/25 20:15 (UTC)It's more humiliating that way and he lives for his victory. So bring it on, Esikko!]
Yeah, I know. It's always dangerous. Many heroes never date or marry because of that. Anyone who gets close to a hero, or a villain, is at risk. Someone one else becomes your weakness.
[And not only do you have to live with that weakness, the other person ends up wrestling with guilt and shame over being the weak link of the person they care about. It's stupid, it's foolish, and humans do it all the time. Even when they know better.]
Oy. Don't gossip at me.
[Bakugo... does not like Fuuta. They've never gotten along, and now actively avoid each other. He has his own opinions on whether Fuuta's good for Dabi or not. But it's because of that, and how much Bakugo cares about the other man, that he eschews interactions regarding those two's relationship. Dabi's business.]
He's not an idiot. He chose to be with him. Respect his decision.
[The resort doesn't need to get any ideas. Bakugo doesn't need any ideas. He's already wrangled his feelings enough, including ones he shouldn't admit, even in his head.]
You really want this to be a surprise, huh.
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Date: 12/4/25 20:27 (UTC)( Esikko hates Fuuta's guts, and has made it outwardly clear from the start— fist fighting him in Dabi's kitchen wasn't the best way he could have gone about it, granted, but as soon as he realized Dabi actually cared about the guy, he held himself back. More and more, he felt like he was holding back— he'd pull Fuuta aside and chew him out for certain decisions, definitely not minding his own business, but he thinks he can't be blamed for that sort of thing. Is it so wrong, to care about someone enough to get involved?
He wishes he could be as hands-off with it as Bakugo. It's just too hard. )
I'm not trying to gossip. He chose it, and I've bitten my tongue in plenty of places and ways, you know, but I can't sit idly by while he takes that idiot's actions or words to mean he's worthless. You know? That's all.
If I didn't respect it, or him, I would be interfering. But I'm not doing that. I'm just saying, he might end up alone on that day if we leave it to others.
( He typed so many more names and insults initially but went back and cleaned it up. He tries so hard to not be mean, but... The inner anger sparks. )
I just want him to know what it feels like. Being cared about, when you expect to be forgotten. Having people be a little selfish in wanting his company. He and I are similar in this way, at least I think.
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Date: 12/4/25 20:50 (UTC)[Stupid question. If he was a hero who never got too close, he wouldn't be having this conversation with Esikko in the first place! A year ago, back home, he'd answer with a resounding "No!" but now... He's learned the pitfalls of traveling a hero's life alone.
By the time Bakugo admitted shit to himself, Esikko and Fuuta were closer, so he simply accepted his place on the side. He's never been one to get involved with other people's personal relationships. Annoying business. Their lives, their choices. He'll give his opinions if he feels it necessary. So far, he's not felt it.
He's seen people do fucking stupid things in the name of "caring" about someone. Heroes often stick their noses in other people's business on principle. But there's a difference between caring about someone and potentially sabotaging what they have. It's a fine line verging on jealousy.
He feels what he feels and told the man as much. It's not always easy, but he'll be content with what he has rather than erode himself pining after what he doesn't.]
That guy can twist anything into self-depreciating.
We're not leaving it to others, idiot. That's why I told you to bring it up to him. Don't say what you're gonna do. [Leaving it a surprise. Dabi already suspects people are going to want to do things with him; he's down on himself pessimistic, not a fool.] He isn't gonna spend that day alone.
[Whether it's them or someone else being with him.]
Huh? Why the hell do you think he doesn't know what all that feels like?
no subject
Date: 12/4/25 21:05 (UTC)He considers the idea of running it vaguely by Dabi, the idea of him trying to close away from it, or say he doesn't need it. But as long as he doesn't leave options for that, and just says what's going to happen, it should be fine, right? He can pick the day. )
Because I've spoken to him about this sort of thing.
And because, I think, the cruel words stick longer. Even if he's felt it before, we'll just have to beat him over the head with it again~ Right?
I'll run it by him to find the best date, but keep your involvement and the activities a surprise, maybe?
no subject
Date: 12/4/25 21:29 (UTC)As for self-depreciation, he's handled plenty from the villain. When Bakugo said he didn't want people knowing about his feelings for Dabi, the man instantly asked if it was because Bakugo was embarrassed of him. ... What the hell?! He's repeatedly reaffirmed his loyalty and protectiveness, stuck with him and bared pieces of himself. Yet so often Dabi remains at arm's length, never entirely trusting his words, always quick to assume the problem or worthlessness is him, never allowing himself the chance to believe someone actually cares about him... for him.
Bakugo's come to accept that as well. Damaged too deep. Of course he wants to save Dabi. Not as a hero, but as a friend. Yet he's been forced to realize, some people simply don't want to be saved. They stopped believing they can be, or deserve to be. So Bakugo leaves his hand in the fire, letting it burn to a blackened skeleton. Ready. Waiting. Even if Dabi never reaches out to truly take his hand... and least it will always be there for him.
Just in case.
That's how he's chosen to love him.
Anyways, Esikko has the right idea on how to handle this. No choice, no options. Dump it right on his doorstep and tell him it's coming. They can knock him off his feet later on the day of their choosing. And make sure Dabi's not alone for the holidays. (Unless he wants to be. Bakugo's not gonna shove himself into the man's life when he needs some fucking personal space. He would be pissed if people dragged him to parties and shit too.) It'll be fine.]
No shit. Don't underestimate everything you've done for him in the past. Some people won't admit they feel good because they're scared it'll stop if they do. That bastard's stubborn as fuck even if you cram proof down his throat.
[So they'll keep cramming.]
Fine. When we do this, we're gonna make sure he's so fucking stuffed he explodes!
[You know, stuffed with care, but hell if he's gonna say something that stupid sappy!]
no subject
Date: 12/4/25 21:58 (UTC)He's seen that Bakugo and Dabi are close in a similar way. More history, but the same reluctance to accept a hand extended his way. Bakugo's extended hand is warm and consistent, and by recognizing that, maybe that's why he doesn't feel the pang of jealousy from watching those two get along that he does when he hears Dabi speaking about Fuuta...? Maybe it's because he trusts Bakugo, or because he's fond of him more each day, too, or because he's a far more reliable presence. Or maybe it's just because with the different ways they offer love, it feels like he could still have a place himself alongside either of them. He tries not to think about it too much.
It's nice hearing from him those affirmations that Dabi is always too embarrassed to give, though. That he's done things for him, or impacted him in some positive way... That it's been noticed at all. So after a pause, he replies. )
I knew I could count on you for this. Thanks, Katsuki.
( It's going to be fun.
It's probably going to end up in a christmas bang.)That's the spirit~ Let's set off our own big firework, hehe. I'll let you know what day it's going to be, and we can stay in contact about setup.
no subject
Date: 12/4/25 22:29 (UTC)Ironically it's far easier for him to talk about someone else's feelings than his own. Those are private. If Esikko can't tell his previous actions and presence around the villain are appreciated, that's on his own pessimistic nature. Both prince and villain are similar, never believing either of them is worth someone else's time or care. Dismissing kindness with doubt or guilt or cynicism. How people can get through their lives not giving a shit about themselves is something Bakugo will never relate to. He's always been proud of himself and valued his own worth, screw what anyone else thinks! He'll make them think he's worth it! Even if that means smashing them in the face with proof.]
Hmph. As if I'd give you shitty advice.
[He'll let things play out. Dabi likes going to parties and getting lost in hedonism. Might be a good change of pace to kick back and do fuck all with his friends.]
Aa. You know how to play card games, right?
no subject
Date: 12/4/25 23:22 (UTC)I knowww... poker? The cards I'm used to are a bit different from these. Teach me a few more games, so I can be prepared.
no subject
Date: 12/4/25 23:26 (UTC)Yeah, yeah. Should be fine with poker.
I'll shove a few more down your throat.
no subject
Date: 12/4/25 23:30 (UTC)If I beat you at any of them, I should get a prize.
how the hell did i miss this?
Date: 12/8/25 23:59 (UTC)Yeah? You think you've even got a chance?
your inbox must always be so full so I can imagine it's easy to miss things!!
Date: 12/9/25 00:05 (UTC)Since it's an even playing field where my frail body can't possibly get in the way? Obviously, I do.
I want to see the furious face you make when you lose. Hehe.
no it's pretty droughty right now thanks to life
Date: 12/9/25 00:08 (UTC)I don't lose. No matter if it's fighting or card games.
I'll wipe the fucking floor with you!
time to singlehandedly fill it up then!! ✨
Date: 12/9/25 00:13 (UTC)*fingerguns* until life interferes~
Date: 12/9/25 00:19 (UTC)kicking life into submission (temporarily)
Date: 12/9/25 00:29 (UTC)A number of games for me to learn, and once I've learned, we set a number of matches to be called the "winner." If I win, I get to pick something for you to wear.
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From:god idk how to play cards, bear with my vagueness
From:s'all good! vagueness is the name of the game.
From:( later on, after messaging dabi )
Date: 12/8/25 23:07 (UTC)That work for you?
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Date: 12/9/25 00:00 (UTC)no subject
Date: 12/9/25 00:09 (UTC)But really, I didn't say it would be just me, but I didn't say you'd be there, either. I said I had plans for him. It's vague enough he should expect more than just some solo date, since he knows me well.
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Date: 12/9/25 00:12 (UTC)Hmph. Good. Didn't think you'd fuck it up. I've got the ingredients for soba when we need them.
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Date: 12/9/25 00:17 (UTC)Soba is like naengmyeon, right? It's going to be even more delicious made fresh. As long as you're in charge, anyway. You'll have to keep us in line.
( There's going to be buckwheat flour everywhere. )
no subject
Date: 12/9/25 00:21 (UTC)Aa. Noodles.
I'm not making the noodles from scratch! We'd never get it done in an evening!
[Those things take time to combine, press, cut, and dry! No, these will be packaged.] Text
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Date: 12/9/25 00:31 (UTC)How should I know that? Well, as long as they're good quality, it's fine.
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