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[blastedass]

« Great Explosion Murder God » 💥 Dynamight 💥 TEXT ✧ AUDIO ✧ VIDEO ✧ ACTION Katsuki Bakugou ✦ My Hero Academia
RESIDENCE ✦ Bakugou / Midoriya Residence
GEMBOND ✦ Ruby
"Katsuki Bakugo. Make it fast or hang the fuck up."

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[blastedass]

[He's right; there is no easy answer. All Might's intentions had been pure and noble, covering where others couldn't or wouldn't, but ultimately becoming a bar set so high, an entire generation of heroes ended with nothing to do or became obsessed with comparing to the invincible hero or were content with simply being "the others" in the system. Heroes became a vocation rather than a calling, and the corruption that was already there began to sink in even deeper and grow. Apathy, selfishness, control, revenge. And yet All Might continued to try and handle it all, believing and wanting to save everyone.

But who saves the heroes from themselves?

Katsuki doesn't have any answers to it either. To say All Might should "take a break" or not spread himself too thin would basically invalidate the entire reason he's still alive. How can he make that decision for someone else? No, you can't be saved because All Might's done his 8 hrs today.

And yet... what if the option is 2 years of 100% or 10 years of 80%? 2000 lives versus 8000?

Who can make such a decision?]

So long as you remember that "We" part.

[defendure]

I don't think just saving civilians is the right answer. It's something we have to do, but...shouldn't we also try to help the people doing this who can be helped? Change can't all be on one side.

[ Is what he meant by do more. All For One likely isn't a redeemable person but Izuku can't help but think that isn't the case for everyone in his sphere. They can't just get away with everything, but don't many of them deserve a chance to be helped like anyone else would?

Izuku thinks that maybe they can't pick and choose like that. Or that he can't. If even one person could be changed for the better or at least saved from themselves, isn't the effort worth being made? Or at least if an understanding could be reached, it could be used to stop such things happening in the future.

Stopping those same mistakes. ]

[blastedass]

You mean helping the fucking villains.

[Katsuki's eyes narrow for several reasons. There's a lot of debate going on over there regarding why villains do the things they do and a lot of people are finding connections to certain villains. He, un-fucking-fortunately, hasn't reached the whole part with Dabi's reveal and all the Todoroki crap before he was yanked here. Otherwise he might have had some additional thoughts.

But even still, the world's not so black and white from where he'd been regardless. What was villainous to what was heroic had been thrown into fluctuation.]

You can't save, or even help, someone who doesn't want to be saved or helped.

[He's had thoughts and he's not blind to the reality of some villains' straights before they became villains. BUT...]

They made their choices. No matter what's going on in your life, you fucking decide. And the results are on you.

[Even extreme cases are the same. If your choice is "Die" or "Rob a bank", then rob the fucking bank to save your life. BUT, you better be fucking prepared to deal with the consequences of robbing a fucking bank.

Seems like so many villains don't get that. They'd rather blame their actions, problems, and choices on society and other people instead of taking their own agency and inclinations into account.

It's stupid.]

[defendure]

I'm not saying they shouldn't face consequences for their actions, Kacchan. But...trying to understand why people do the things they do, or reaching out a hand to those who might take it - can you really tell me people can't change?

[ Katsuki didn't rob banks or kill anyone, but he used to tell people to kill themselves (...well, he still sort of yells about dying) and he used to hurt people because he could.

Izuku never saw that in black and white, either. And he's always been listening to every villain, every hero, and slowly coming to the same conclusions he'd reached even as a child.

If someone's hurt, you help them. Even if it means hurting yourself. They're not in the right, but even so... ]

There's middle ground between making people feel the force of the law and trying to do so...like the sort of hero I've always admired would. It's sort of - the difference between All Might and some of the other top heroes. Or maybe it's something more than even that.

[ Katsuki wasn't there for Gentleman, though, who was essentially a rogue youtuber but still classed as a villain. Or...some of those other revelations. ]

Some of them can't or won't change, but I can't just believe that of everyone without listening or giving them a chance to change.

[blastedass]

Maybe they can change, but what difference is it going to make to some of them? They'll be stuck in prison for the rest of their lives while the people they blame continue to go "free" in their minds.

[He's honestly asking those questions not just for Izuku, but for himself. He knows Izuku wants to talk to, even understand, Shigaraki, but after everything that guy's done... how many people he's killed... what fucking good will it do to "understand" someone like that? It changes nothing for him!

The poison cloud guy. They understood him, even helped him, and yet he still is going to prison for a time for what he did. Truthfully, he could go either way by the time he gets out of there. Either grateful that people understood him enough to help him, or vengeful that he was punished by a society he didn't fit into for something he couldn't control.]

I don't remember All Might sitting down to a fucking picnic with the villains he arrested or defeated. All Might won! That's what makes a hero! If you want to talk to these people, then how many others die while you have your chat? You're talking about trying to save everyone, and yet you want to understand all of them?

You're only one person, with limited time, Deku. You have to fucking pick.

[Who to save. Who to understand. "ALL" is not an option! Just like Katsuki can't pick "ALL" the fights he fucking wants. And yes this makes him angry! His perfect little world and understanding of good and evil, heroes and villains, has been shattered as many times as his damn childhood pride! That control he thought he had over his future, his life, his ideals, it's no longer an easy grip, but one he's fighting to keep a hold of every time their world is rocked with another revelation of the dark side.]

A chance to change for some is only a chance for them to do worse in this world. And you'll be the one who gave it to them. Are you sure you want that guilt riding on your shoulders?

[Because he can speak from hell of experience, it fucking sucks.]

[defendure]

You know I wouldn't let anyone hurt someone else in front of me, Kacchan.

[ Better than most, even. Because he'd put himself in the way of Katsuki's fists and explosions when they were children to spare other people that pain, because it wasn't right, and...he still does that today, with villains who would do worse.

Every time he'd stood in the way he'd tried to talk Katsuki down, though. Every time he stands in the way of anyone he's still talking and talking and never shutting up in some ways -

And sometimes, even if it's once in a blue moon only, someone will listen to him. ]

I don't have to pick the way you're saying. And I can't commit to what you're asking of me right now. If I had ever done that, we wouldn't be talking. I've given you chances to change, too, and you've taken them.

I'll take the guilt and pain as long as it's better for everyone else in the end and I'll like it.

[blastedass]

I'm not saying you fucking have to.

[He's well away of how Izuku operates, even though he can't understand it. A hero protects. They intercede on the behalf of those who can't fight against their predators. He's seen Izuku do it plenty when he'd bullied other kids and had the other boy stand up for them, taking whatever damage that came his way for doing so.

It's not exactly what he's trying to get at here, and he's starting to wonder if Izuku can even fucking see the point. Or if he's so goddamn blinded and messed up by his utter lack of self-worth and his overriding desire to save everyone and fix every damn problem that he can't fathom he has limitations.

Or that other people have limitations as well.]

Not asking you to commit to anything either. I'm trying to gauge how long it's gonna take you to fucking snap.

[No comment on his own chances and changes. He doesn't like talking about that with other people, much less the guy who's the core of them.]

Far better for everyone else, huh. Do you even understand how contradicting that mindset is?

[Admittedly, part of this is playing a realistic devil's advocate. Wanting to see if Izuku's going to have the answers to some of the problems Katsuki thinks he's going to run into. Sometimes when someone's wearing their rose-colored glasses...

...you need to punch them in the face to get them to take those fuckers off.]

[defendure]

If you think I'm going to snap, why don't you help me?

[ It's not even something Izuku expects Katsuki to do even as he asks. He's used to having to do certain things on his own, and he's used to other people not seeing things in the same way he does. And right now, he doesn't feel any more heard than Katsuki does.

But he hasn't often felt heard by Katsuki. Only a handful of times, and several of them here. ]

If the only people who want to do anything about all of this are inside my head, that's just how it is, and I'll do my best with that. And if no one else is willing to try, I just...won't snap.

[ He's got his arms crossed over his chest, hands on his elbows. Defensive, not really looking over. ]

You keep telling me to ask you for help, but how can I if you keep telling me there isn't anything to be done? That just tells me I don't have any options but to do things alone.

[blastedass]

Why the fuck do you think I chased after you when that fucking Hand-Face asshole was coming for you?

[When Izuku was so damn determined to go out there alone so no one else would have to get hurt by the guy literally hunting his damn Quirk. He tried to help him, stubbornly refusing to leave. Not to mention the constant help in his training under All Might. He's been helping him here too, from sparring to the rest. So... excuse him for giving a speculative frown about Izuku asking that question.

But beyond knowing the other boy makes it out of the war okay, he has no idea what happens to him afterwards. How it affects him or what it causes him to do.]

Oh.

[He just "won't snap". Like it's that simple to decide. Maybe it is. Katsuki always say he refuses to give up or lose, both with similar conviction. Confidence is one thing. Blind determination is another. It's all speculative, but he's seen how Deku operated in the past. It's not going to surprise him if things escalate.]

You make it sound like I'm not going to fight All For One or Shigaraki...

[defendure]

No...I make it sound like I believe there's an aspect of all of this only I can or want to take on, because you've told me you don't think it's worthwhile. You'll help me when it comes to a battle, but right now you're not even considering a solution where you help me try to help anyone who could be helped.

[ Some middle ground where they figure it out together seems difficult when they're so opposite right now and Izuku doesn't expect Katsuki to agree with him completely but...

His tendency to take on the world alone isn't going to be helped my everyone refusing to help him with one aspect of it. ]

[blastedass]

I'm trying to open your thick head up to the reality that you can't help everyone! You're so fucking hung up on sacrificing yourself and believing you can help everyone, I don't know what the fuck's going to happen to your brain when it hits you that you can't!

For all you fucking know, you're going to have to kill All For One to stop him.

[He turns to face the other boy, eyes hard and burning.]

Can you do that? Can you save someone by not saving them? Or helping them? Can you just fucking stop someone?

Permanently.

[No, All Might didn't kill All For One. But Katsuki doesn't believe Shigaraki is the same kind of person as All For One. All For One has plans, reasons to keep people around, to stand at the top of society and rule it.

That fucking psycho on the other hand? Just wants to destroy everything.]

[defendure]

Did I say I wanted to try to help All For One?

[ Like - honestly speaking, he would save anyone in front of him, but he does understand when people have gone too far to ever change. And he knows even the people he wants to help would still end up locked up, and he accepts that. ]

I've already taken people down without helping them. But I don't think that addresses everything it should, Kacchan. There are - there are some things that are messed up about how we do things, but we can't address them if we don't see them.

[blastedass]

You don't have to say it. I've seen it in your eyes too many times.

[He honestly doesn't think Izuku's stupid, but he does think... everything he's said before. Blind, independent, self-sacrificing, trusting, zealous, someone who would potentially run himself to ragged embers in his question to solve all the world's problems by himself.

Yes, he's already done that, but Katsuki's pretty sure it weighs on Izuku's chest he never got to talk to them or help them. He was left only with the recourse to fight because they hadn't been interested in chatting with him. A hard sigh jettisons from his lips and he rolls his shoulders before continuing to walk.]

Yeah. There are. A lot of messed up shit. But I don't think there's a blanket fix that addresses everything. Don't think there can be one. Even if we see them.

[World's not perfect. Never will be.]

[defendure]

I'm not asking for a blanket fix, Kacchan. I'm saying...

[ He takes his time this time, before speaking. Walking as he thinks, so quiet.

Asking for help has historically not often worked out for him. Asking for understanding...the same.

It hasn't gotten him down enough to stop moving forward, but it probably does contribute to his habit of handling things all on his own. ]

I'm asking you to support me when I try to understand others. I'm not saying my way will always work or always be right. But the times it has - aren't they worth it? I don't want to do less just because it's easier. And it's - it wouldn't be the same burden if other people were willing to share it.

[blastedass]

[There's an in and out swerving issue going on here where they're talking specifically them and talking generalizations, with Katsuki erring more towards the latter than the former in terms of fixing shit. He's irritated at what's been happening in his world. Thought he'd go right out of middle school into the world of heroes, kick all the competitions' ass, blaze onto the real world, blow up villains all over the walls, save the nation from all worry, and surpass All Might in an explosion of victory the likes of which the world has never seen!

None of that... has happened. And he's starting to think none of it will.

Because the world's not like that.]

...

And how am I gonna support you in trying to understanding others?

[Surely not if someone's attacking them. Because then he's going to defend himself and fuck your want to understand. You can talk to them after he's beaten them into the ground.]

[defendure]

[ No, when has he ever told Katsuki not to defend himself? In battle Izuku will always defend himself too - unless it would hurt someone innocent. He would never do anything to hurt a civilian. ]

Give me a chance to try. Like you did with the guy with the poison Quirk. I'm not saying don't disarm people or don't take them down, but I don't...think I like the kind of heroics where the only thing anyone listens to is a rule book.

[blastedass]

[Well there could be a villain who starts shouting his or her sobstory history while attacking them, like some of the dramatic ones are prone to do. Exposition during action. It'd be hard o listen to them talk if Katsuki's over there detonating explosions and trying to slug them into unconsciousness on the jaw.

For example.]

So stand back and let you ask a question.

[Or do a normal Deku and jump between him and the villain. Ugh. Fucking ass. Still willing to sacrifice himself and take a bomb to the face for someone.]

You're gonna get taken advantage of. You know that, don't you.

[defendure]

I don't think I'm as bad a judge of character as that.

[ But...yes. He knows that sometimes this is going to fuck him over. Trusting people always has that risk. Helping people always has that risk. ]

I'll be your idealism if you'll be my cynicism.

[blastedass]

Not sure my brain can handle your kind of idealism...

[Since that's one of the main things he has no idea about when it comes to Izuku. How he manages to be the way he is. There's a limit to "I'm stubborn" before it turns into "You're crazy". Katsuki thinks the other boy's passed that by now.]

Fine. You can try to talk, if I'm with you. If they're already on the offensive when we get there, no promises.

[defendure]

[ Oh, he's definitely crazy in that shounen protagonist way where you believe people more than makes any sense whatsoever. It's a stubborn sort of idealism that persists even when he's ground away. ]

That's all I'm asking.

[ To try.

...they may have to revisit this later. ]

[blastedass]

[You worry him sometimes... Katsuki frowns at him, still not looking like he agrees with the deal he's brokering. But there's really nothing to do here save for talk about it.]

Fine.

[They may have to. Especially since he runs his hand up the back of his head in exasperation.]

You know we're gonna forget all this fucking stuff when we go back.

[defendure]

...yeah.

[ That's how it's going to work if they don't find a way back that's different. Izuku knows that. ]

But...maybe...I don't know. There's always a chance.

[blastedass]

[He doesn't think they will. What if they spent two years here, got super stronger than they are now, and suddenly pop back into the previous battle with no time passed, but still two years stronger?

That's some fucking gameshark code cheats there.]

We'd fuck up our timeline if we did. Probably. I don't want to go back to school knowing I've had your dick in my mouth.

[Top concern. Yep. Doesn't sound too irritated by it though. More sarcastic and amused.]

[defendure]

[ All of this...WOULD make things odd back home. Or - he has no idea what they would be like.

He doesn't want to think about it that hard. ]

I don't think I can act like none of this matters even if it might not exist someday. Or there'd be no reason to talk about anything, would there?

[blastedass]

[Well for one thing, he'd be more than happy to lord over a lot of their class he had wings at one time and could fucking fly. then have to do some major damage control when people saw the damn bite marks on Izuku's neck.

... okay so maybe all of this should stay here. What happens in Noctium stays in Noctium. Yep.]

I'm not turning into a nihilist, Deku. It's nice to know when shit gets awkward though.