( Esikko and nice don't normally go in the same sentence. But that includes people being nice to him, and that's changed so much since arriving here that he doesn't know what to do with it. He's finding himself caring a lot more than he's used to, finding himself more emotionally attached than he's ever been, and he doesn't know what to do about it, how to feel about it.
It feels unmistakably like things like this aren't meant for people like him. Like he's partaking in something he's not allowed to be, like it's all going to flip over on him at some point and it's going to hurt more than ever before because he allowed himself to lean into it. But despite that lingering fear, he wants to hope... And how long has it been since he's done that?
His lips press together in his thought, but he eventually hums some sort of an acknowledging noise and moves to head upstairs, using the railing. He's managing, even if he's weak. Because he had help, because the medication is working, and because he stubbornly wants to live. Wants to accept these things that he shouldn't be allowed to have. )
I'll be quick.
( A shower, though he knows not to make it as hot as he normally likes it. Don't want to pass out again... The water starts, mercifully without any throwing up, and he busies himself with cleaning up. It's not the first time he's had to clean blood off of himself. )
[Compared to Bakugo, Esikko's pretty damn nice. Polite, if a bit cold with some wry charm. He's met some pretty rude ass people in his world, as well as here, and wouldn't put the prince ranked among them. Figuring out those he wants to spend his time and resources on is a different beast altogether. Bakugo didn't come to this place thinking he'd make friends or more than tolerate anyone. Allies at best and that was it.
Not entirely keeping to that idea, but hell if he's going to dwell on it. Right now, there are a few people in this goddamn resort Bakugo keeps an eye on and would give a shit if something bad happened to them. Hell no he's not going to say that to any of them! They'll have to use their brains and understand it through his actions. Sheesh.
Doesn't mean he's a nice person. Bakugo turns as Esikko leaves, red eyes narrowing on the other man and boring holes into his back the entire time he walks. Those legs better support him. Those feet better stay balanced. He didn't show up here and rip bloody fucking roots out of Esikko's back just to have the prince die on the goddamn stairs!]
Rush and I'll cram you in the washer. [Aka: don't hurry on his sake. Take care of yourself and make sure you're clean and well before showing your face. And for fuck's sake, don't pass out in the shower or fall out of it or otherwise make him come up there!
... never mind Bakugo staying quiet downstairs with his ears peeled for any aid Esikko might need, while he cleans up the rest of the floor.]
( He knows, by now, that Bakugo's harsh words are a front. It's not like Esikko is one to blame him for it, either. He hardly knows how to speak his own feelings, either, especially when they're so soft. His steps up the stairs are slow and careful, and the handrail helps a lot with him making it up there, but he does manage. There have been too many times where he's had to crawl out of these situations alone, so if anything, having the backup is reassuring...
But his shower goes without issue, thankfully. He's a little dizzy, a little unsteady, and very hungry, but he manages to pull on some clean sweat pants and a baggy t-shirt— a much plainer outfit than he normally allows himself to be seen in— and makes his way back downstairs.
He looks better now, from that alone. There's a little more color in his face, the blood's all gone, and he was careful to avoid his bandaging in the shower, so there aren't any issues of him bleeding through. His eyes trail for a long moment over the newly cleaned entranceway, and he breathes in slowly as he trudges towards the kitchen, where he assumes he can find Bakugo.
It might make sense for him to go straight for food, and he'll try his best to, but first— first he's going to approach Bakugo, wherever he is, and drape himself obnoxiously over his shoulders. It's a hug. Not a very tight one, because he's worried that even as injured as he is, Bakugo might throw him off, but. Take this wordless hug, punk...
He's not sure if he's ever initiated a hug before, but he's trying his hardest not to think about that right now. )
[One step at a time. Each one's under his careful eye and ear. Any slip, any stumble, any struggle... but none of them happen and Bakugo quietly goes back to his work. Feelings are for each person to deal with; he doesn't wanna deal with other people's feelings. Most of the time. Arrogant blowhards, whining cowards, sappy weirdos, gabby idiots, fucking extras. He's got his own shit to handle. And yet here he is, checking in on people, helping someone with his injuries. Dammit.
Bakugo pops the lid off the broth and takes a small spoon to its clarified surface. One soft puff of air cools it for a taste test. Tsk, bland as fuck in his opinion. Probably because it's not flaming hot; Esikko doesn't need his guts turning to lava when he's trying to digest something nice. Steam cuts off under lid once more and he crouches down on the balls of his feet, red eyes peering into a lit oven. The roast probably has a few more minutes.
One hand on the stove rim pulls him up, a knee popping for whatever reason, and Bakugo returns to the fridge for a drink. Esikko would probably want hot chocolate, but in his state, he needs as much iron as possible, to help his blood loss, not a shit ton of sugar.
He's just finished taking the roast out of the oven, a dark rusty colored mound of spiraling lines glistening with savory juice amid an aroma of mealy potato and scant spices. Faint hints of "other" wander amid the main scent, contributed by the bits and pieces of Esikko's leftovers sprinkled so nimbly within and now suspended among the mashed starches. He might have made a glaze to go along with this if he wasn't focused on the stock-based sou-
... oy. Why the fuck is Esikko glomping him like some grade-school kid? A tall as fuck grade-school kid. Luckily he wasn't carrying anything hot or sharp, dammit! Bakugo glares over his shoulder, lip quivering in a warning snarl. But... tch, he lets him have it for a little while. Just a little while.]
( Like this, the floral scent of his blood is a lot less overwhelming by now. Still faintly there, ever present, but no longer coating every inch of the air around Esikko. So he doesn't feel too bad about being close like this, now that he smells more like the faint scent of his fancy soaps and shampoos. But, he doesn't push it too far. A little while, that's all he wanted anyway, and then he's slipping away with a hum of thought at that suggestion. )
I feel sick, though.
( It's true, but of course he's going to try to eat. He knows that it should help with that feeling, too...
And so he heads to peer at what's been made, eyes scanning quietly over the food for a long moment before, out of nowhere, he asks: )
[Was it bad Bakugo thought he was rooting around in a potpourri bowl while digging those branches out of Esikko's back? Mixing expected copper with a rush of overpowering floral and gory visuals was enough to make his stomach confused. At least Esikko's dampened down to clean shower and shampoo for now, clashing with the savory scents filling the kitchen.
Bacon will fight flowers all day.
Bakugo himself isn't very clean right now. He's washed his arms, face, and neck before doing any food work, but his front's splattered and soaked. Good thing Esikko's hugging his back.]
Then take it slow.
[Feeling sick isn't a promise of being sick. Bakugo lets Esikko look over the food on the stovetop, taking the time to grab a plate from the cabinet.]
I'll think about it.
[Living off someone else's graces bothers his pride, but he also opened his suite to others during the swapped month.]
Until I was lifted to this position by someone else, I'd spend a lot of time using rooms from others on these levels.
( Quietly, he serves himself a tiny amount, trying to be modest so less goes to waste. That's not a habit picked up in the palace at all, of course— but one he had to adapt to when out on the road, on the run. He hasn't even realized it's carried over to this place. )
I don't use the kitchen, either, other than to heat certain ingredients for my potions... So if you do decide it, there's a room for you and space in the common areas like that.
( He sits at the table with a quiet little sigh from the effort of it all, but does immediately try to start eating. Slowly... It helps that Bakugo made it tasty. )
[He'll reach a top rank on his own, even if he has to put himself out of his comfort zone a million times. This fucking place isn't going to break him down. He'll do it on his own terms, at his own pace, with people he wants to, without the shitty House's influence! Then he'll use his power to give it a blazing middle finger.
Kind of like what Esikko is doing right now, but Bakugo's got pride issues.
He ladles a little bowl of soup out for the prince, letting him cut himself a piece of the false roast. Despite being mostly potatoes, it cuts firm enough as if it's a solid piece. Even if Esikko's only taking a small slice of the butt. Luckily Bakugo thinks the man's taking measured portions so he can gauge if he's gonna puke or not.
But he needs the food regardless.]
I'm gonna rank down.
[It comes out quiet and curt. He's only talked to one other person about his decision when it comes to ranks. Most people don't speak about it and he figures there's a reason for that. But considering the conversations he's had about ranks and suits over the past several months, Bakugo's theorized a gamble's worth it.]
( For an oddly long moment, Esikko is quiet at that. Bakugo doesn't know about the puzzle that the House sent him, about the agreement he was forced to make in order to keep this fancy title— he can't tell anyone about how he got to this point, even though he wasn't the one to put in the downgrade in the first place. It had registered as such, answered as such, and granted him a path...
And he has to think about how to best word this so that Bakugo can get the hint without it being explicit, without it risking his own standing. So after a couple of mouthfuls of roast and stew, he speaks. )
That's a good idea. A test like that... you should let those you trust know. A handful of them, at least, if you have that many.
( Blatant encouragement, seemingly baseless, and the suggestion to spread knowledge of what he's about to do before he does it. It would still work the same, right? So long as he doesn't mention it retroactively... )
But my offer will stay the same. I'm the one indebted to you, anyway. And I don't enjoy that feeling.
[He's aware of the quiet. There are only two or three people, Esikko included, the hero's spoken to regarding his thoughts on the ranking and his current plan on it. If such a thing was common knowledge, people would have discussed it long before now. Bakugo worked out his gamble on his own, inquiring about the Ace's rank versus number depending on game, and noting its behavior during events in the resort, specifically with the ranks inverted.
He's even speculated, if this is the right path, the House would issue some sort of gag order to prevent it from getting out. Something he's begrudgingly respected by only bringing this up with people he trusts implicitly. And even that's usually vague and quick. So when Esikko respond with his own meandering comment, Bakugo accepts it with a grunt and little else.]
Tch. Who I wanna tell anything's my fucking business.
[Considering he told Esikko... the prince can take that as he wants. Bakugo's already done so. Not as keen to spread the knowledge, considering the hypothetical gag and the House's petty nature. He worked it out by himself, with his own research and questions! Other people can do the same. Hmph. Besides, anyone rank 5 or higher really has no need to know.]
You ever find me bleeding out on the floor, handle it and we're even.
[Patching someone up isn't equal trade to suddenly gaining a sugar daddy.]
Oh, stop with that. It's not as if it wouldn't benefit me either.
( It's an instant sort of retort, annoyed as it is soft, but Esikko immediately feels ashamed at letting any sort of implication of his own loneliness slip through like that. So he shoves another bite of loaf into his mouth, even if he's finding it difficult to chew, difficult to want to eat anything, and stares down at the soup with tired eyes.
At least trying to rank down will be worth it. If it's a puzzle like the one he got, he expects Bakugo would be the type to be able to handle it. It wasn't complex at all. )
...It's the Divinity, by the way. The cause for this. The curse of a god, you know... My body has been weak since birth, so having this eating away at it only causes that poor health of mine to decline faster. It's this sort of cycle that ends in the Divinity trying to eat away at me completely.
( He's eaten a bit, at least, but he has to put down his silverware now with a quiet sigh. )
I think it wants to use my body like soil, to be reborn. I don't know, since it kills me in the end, anyway. Those potions are my attempts at postponing it while I look for a more permanent solution.
[As someone who recently changed ranks himself, again, Esikko's had his hand in the shifting levels of their stupid social scale. He's also pissed off the House before. Bakugo hasn't forgotten that damn branding the prince sported a while ago. Like hell is he going to get the guy involved more than he needs to be. The prince knows his plan and Bakugo can already tell Esikko's thought about this before. Maybe even knows more, but still kept shit vague.
Enough of that. He reaches across the table and pinches the plate rim to drag it over, out of reach. No more for him. Before his jaw locks up, or worse, his stomach rejects everything. Esikko's eaten enough for Bakugo's satisfaction. The rest can go in the fridge for reheating later.]
Try to finish the soup. You'll need liquid. [Having lost so much blood already. ] Don't guzzle it.
[In case Esikko thought he had to cram that down his throat too. Take his time, sip when he feels less nauseous, rest when he's balancing on the edge of blowing chunks. Gross. Bakugo pushes his chair out and heads for the stove to handle the leftovers.]
Divinity, huh... [Getting a glimpse into Esikko's mysterious affliction. He was curious, but avoided demanding more information unless it was necessary. Though he did snarl at the prince to tell him once he felt better.] Is that the price you had to pay for resetting your life? Or something that took the opportunity to latch on?
[A deal with the devil or some dumb schmuck who got unlucky.]
...It's punishment, for committing the taboo. Eating a god. So it was a price... to be able to use magic more, I guess. At the points I've done this, I don't generally realize I'm resetting my life. It's not a decision I make until the last desperate moment.
( He realizes, with a frown, that it's hard to explain how the timelines all blend together in his mind. How the first time and this current time feel so wildly different and yet the same, how his emotions always seem stuck on this same track, how no matter how wildly he flails he can never seem to get himself off of it.
He pokes at the soup with his spoon a few times, clearly trying to find the will to take another sip. But first: ) If you'd like another opinion, you could ask that ex-bodyguard of mine. Kirma.
( The same one he'd complained to Bakugo about plenty of times, who'd kidnapped him. But also the same he killed some time back, who was apparently alive again and ignoring him. He does another particularly annoyed stab at his soup before lifting the spoon to his mouth this time, taking a slow sip. )
He's always so opinionated on my business, but maybe he's right.
Hah! You thought you could commit divine cannibalism and get away without blowback?
[Esikko's reveal sounds completely ridiculous, even though Bakugo's at least come to accept the other man's not lying. Gods and magic don't exist in his world beyond traditional Japanese beliefs that many people have mostly left behind outside of ceremonies, holidays, and other, well, traditions. But he's not here to judge Esikko's world. Albeit snarking at the other man for making some shit choices in his opinion.]
And the god you ate? Doesn't sound like it gets a do over in life.
[Is this pity? Hell no! But bluntly pointing out, if it's true, Esikko murdered someone else all for the sake of trying to give himself a better life, screw what it cost the person he slaughtered. Bakugo isn't gonna blame the god for giving Esikko the worst case of indigestion/food poisoning known to man in revenge.]
Tch, the guy you've said nothing but shit about? Pass.
[At this point in time, the hero's liable to punch the dog out rather than listen to anything he has to say. He doesn't really know about the "killed him" part yet. Or he's been told Esikko did it in self defense. He finishes packing up the soup in a container and slots it in the fridge.]
A bodyguard should know what he's getting himself into, Prince Prick.
( For a moment, Esikko is quiet, and it's not clear from his tense expression if he's upset or lost in his own thoughts. Maybe some combination of both? But he doesn't snap, or sigh, or anything like he normally might— he just has another slow sip of soup before he speaks, and keeps his eyes on the bowl even as he does. )
That god was a flower. Gods in our world are concepts more than anything else. This was lone flower blooming on a mountain top.
( It's the same language he always speaks, with Peacock's translation picking it up as always, but there's something foreign sounding in the name beyond even that.
He feels himself getting sick again, so he lays his spoon down, staring into the reflections of the broth. )
I hate him, but there's also a reason I've stuck by him until now. But... maybe part of me just wishes he'd run into someone who could see past his innocent demeanor to the twisted ego he really has.
( Now, he sighs, rubbing at his temples like that might help. )
[Bakugo leaves him to his thoughts as he searches the kitchen for some containers for the roast. Esikko might not cook or eat in a lot, but the suite's well stocked with supplies for it. He sets a glass container on the stove, then begins slicing through the roast as an angle to make it easier to shingle within its new home.]
Doesn't answer the question.
[Translation or weird tone or not, the words don't do anything to address what Bakugo was getting at. Taken at face value, it makes the entire ordeal sound worse, picking on a lone creature struggling to survive, or consuming something that alone had managed to surpass all odds and live in a place it shouldn't have been able to.
Bakugo notes the way Esikko puts his spoon down and comes by to take the bowl and the spoon away before the man can force himself to try another sip. That's enough for now. No point in making hi puke.]
You told me you haven't been around him for fucking months, Prince Prick.
[During the painting copy fiasco, even earlier than that, Esikko made it sound like he wasn't dealing with the dog anymore. Was that a lie?]
The gods are reborn in each life, too. The whole world is. But they remember, unlike the rest.
( He sighs, but allows his hands to drop away from his own face. Instead, he watches Bakugo gather things up with a twitch of a small frown. It bothers him, to sit here, to barely be able to hold down food, to have been saved and fed and not even be able to make it up in any significant way.
But he knows getting up would only make it worse, so he curls his fingers into his palms and stays out. )
I have been trying to deal with him less, yes. We no longer live together, but he finds me in my room, in the hallways, while I'm out. He's an annoying dog.
It's not just your life you're resetting, but your entire world's existence.
[Though technically, someone's "life" basically includes their entire world, so yeah. That's logical. Still sounds like a ridiculous piece of magic for one person to randomly stumble across.
Bakugo finishes up the leftovers, roast slices layers nicely in the container, and caps the glass with its silicone lid. Into the fridge with the soup. The remains in Esikko's bowl... down the sink. Normally he'd bitch at someone for wasting food, but there's barely five spoonfuls left. The guy did well enough with what he had.
As for Esikko's guilt... that's his burden. Bakugo's not nice enough to comfort someone for shooting himself in the foot. At least the prince isn't pitching a fit.]
Hmph. [Maybe he heard wrong, but Bakugo was under the impression Esikko had no further dealings with someone who abused him. But this isn't his business.] With your rank now, you can order the staff to take him away, or get a fucking restraining order.
[With the ability to wield the glories of the Hotel to his liking, any interaction Esikko has with someone he doesn't want to have interactions with, is on him.
As for being in the guy's suite... well that's just gross.]
It's like shifting time, or... visiting another timeline, where things were different. I don't interrupt anyone's life, in reality. It's difficult to explain.
( Because time is weird, timelines are weird, universes... It's a little like being in the Peacock, actually.
But he considers the other words. True, he has his rank now, and that seems to be ahead of even the TRANSGRESSOR mark that's still so permanently etched into his neck. Most staff will still listen to him, despite that, though he'll get sideeyes and questions on occasion... But.
But is it that simple? Are any toxic relationships simple? )
...I'm aware of that, at least. I suppose it makes sense that you wouldn't want to hear my complaints, if I'm the one allowing any possibility for these things to happen. ( His hair is starting to dry now, its usual waves, and he runs his fingers through a lock of it quietly. ) But I don't hate everything.
And I suppose it would feel strange, or empty, to completely turn away from someone who has always been there. Who I had focused on when there was nothing else to focus on? ( He doesn't know how to explain it. ) And after all I've done to him, I guess a part of me feels it must just be the repayment that's deserved.
So when you reset, the life, timeline, you were in vanishes, and a new one slots into your future?
[Yeah, it's difficult to explain, but Bakugo's also a superpower nerd, SECRETLY, so this has a morbid interest despite the topic being pretty wrong in many ways.
Most things fall apart when you start talking about time travel. Rules have to be established and held rigidly or everything starts to break up with a flurry of "what if's" and "why didn't you's" all over.
Kind of odd an Ace rank would still have that mark on his neck, but he guesses the Peacock holds grudges hard. Then again, the Ace rank is kind of screwy compared to all the others. Bit of a wildcard at times.
Toxic relationships are both simple and complex. Simple in that if you're in one, get the fuck out. Complex in that it's not so easy. The latter of which Bakugo simply can't understand because he's never been in one.]
Would you wanna listen to someone whine after you watched them shoot their own foot?
[It's less a dismiss to Esikko and more trying to get him to realize he can control his own decisions.]
Never said you did.
[Even though later Esikko will said everything about him's infuriating. MAKE UP YOUR MIND, MAN!!]
You've done to him? All you've ever said is what he's done to you.
...Not quite. It resets for me, because in order for it to reset, Kirma or I have to die. Or at least, that's how I set it up before. Chaining myself to someone else... made it easier.
But I severed that chain here. It's odd, since I always thought he hated me for setting it up in the first place— but he was sad, when I did.
( Obviously it's not a literal chain he's talking about here. Like an invisible chain between souls, forcing them both to always end up back together somehow. Like, a manmade red string of fate, in a dark, twisted sort of way...?
Esikko looks like he's not pleased with himself for it, at least. )
That painting-me was so angry that I had done that. And it made me wonder, for the first time... if the "me" of any past was really "me."
[Bakugo rests his back against the counter, arms crossed over his chest, the food put away and the dishes soaking in a soapy sink. Every time Esikko expands on his story, it introduces new things or changes what he thought he knew.
Kirma being from Esikko's world is... well... Esikko probably told him that before, but it never clicked until now. He thought it was some crazy bastard from the hotel that ended up being a problem.]
Has anyone told you you're a fucking idiot?
[Dragging someone else in this stupid resetting spell. Cannibalizing a god. Shackling himself to someone who's abusive and yet both of them are apparently codependent on each other. Then breaking it off here after six or seven lifetimes together.]
Sounds like the only thing that stays the same in all your lives is that you ultimately don't like your life.
( At the table, Esikko fidgets with his own hands, cold fingertips pressing into the palm of the opposite, eyes tracing the way his skin takes time to fill the color back in. )
But I think the problem is that I do. Not the details, not what happens, not how it ends, of course— but it would be much easier to die and be free of it all. But I can't think that way.
( He can't be like Aventurine, who came to him begging for death, who used him like a tool to get it. He can't be like Kirma, who gives in and lets death happen again and again. It has him wondering if that's how it should be, for him. )
What bothers me the most is that there's not enough time for me to continue trying. Resetting is the closest thing I can manage.
( Another press of his palm, a squeeze, a distracted dig of his own fingernails to try and distract from how stupid he feels sharing this. )
Here, though, it's different, isn't it? People are brought back in an entirely different way. If I can find a way to manage this curse, maybe I can simply... keep living. For a while. Even if I have to die once or twice first, if I don't forget my precious memories, then it's entirely different, you know?
[He's not asking for clarification. Esikko's the only one who knows if his dislike for his own life is either apparent or truthful. Bakugo's not here to dig into it. He pushes off the counter and tugs open the freezer to grab some ice from the tray. Then shuts the door and soon deposits the cubes into a glass from the cabinet. Water follows.
He lowers the glass after a drink.]
You're the one who trapped yourself in an unending cycle.
[Of course he can't think that way; as far as Bakugo knows, the curse is endless. Hard to know now if Esikko knew the magic he tampered with would result in such a thing or if he was a foolish moron dabbling in shit beyond his understanding.
He frowns at the second part. In one way, it makes sense; in another...]
You're one of the few who have unlimited tries. How the hell is that not enough time?
[Esikko might feel stupid sharing it, but Bakugo's trying to connect all the dots and feeling he isn't succeeding as much as he wants. The prince ends with "you know?" and the blonde gives him a flat look over the glass' rim.]
Nope.
[He does not fucking know at all.]
You haven't died in the Peacock yet. Either from your curse, another guest, or House related shit.
It's not unending, and it's not unlimited. It takes more energy each time, and my health seems to be getting worse with each cycle, so I'm on a time limit, as well, even if I don't know what it is.
( He pushes himself up from the table, finally, a little steadier on his feet than he had been going up to the shower. He still looks too pale, and his eyes look heavier than usual, but all things considered, he's doing much better. )
I haven't died yet, but I nearly did, and I've seen people who have. They don't bring you back as a newborn, they bring you back with something... wrong, in some other way. So I'm just saying... I'd keep my memories, unlike all these other times back home. Some of those are still lost.
( He sighs. )
I know you must not think I should simply die and accept it, or you wouldn't have saved me, so forget all of this for now. Can I just ask... Someone told me about that "speed dial" thing. Can I add you to mine?
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Date: 1/21/25 03:40 (UTC)It feels unmistakably like things like this aren't meant for people like him. Like he's partaking in something he's not allowed to be, like it's all going to flip over on him at some point and it's going to hurt more than ever before because he allowed himself to lean into it. But despite that lingering fear, he wants to hope... And how long has it been since he's done that?
His lips press together in his thought, but he eventually hums some sort of an acknowledging noise and moves to head upstairs, using the railing. He's managing, even if he's weak. Because he had help, because the medication is working, and because he stubbornly wants to live. Wants to accept these things that he shouldn't be allowed to have. )
I'll be quick.
( A shower, though he knows not to make it as hot as he normally likes it. Don't want to pass out again... The water starts, mercifully without any throwing up, and he busies himself with cleaning up. It's not the first time he's had to clean blood off of himself. )
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Date: 1/21/25 06:52 (UTC)Not entirely keeping to that idea, but hell if he's going to dwell on it. Right now, there are a few people in this goddamn resort Bakugo keeps an eye on and would give a shit if something bad happened to them. Hell no he's not going to say that to any of them! They'll have to use their brains and understand it through his actions. Sheesh.
Doesn't mean he's a nice person. Bakugo turns as Esikko leaves, red eyes narrowing on the other man and boring holes into his back the entire time he walks. Those legs better support him. Those feet better stay balanced. He didn't show up here and rip bloody fucking roots out of Esikko's back just to have the prince die on the goddamn stairs!]
Rush and I'll cram you in the washer. [Aka: don't hurry on his sake. Take care of yourself and make sure you're clean and well before showing your face. And for fuck's sake, don't pass out in the shower or fall out of it or otherwise make him come up there!
... never mind Bakugo staying quiet downstairs with his ears peeled for any aid Esikko might need, while he cleans up the rest of the floor.]
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Date: 1/21/25 07:15 (UTC)But his shower goes without issue, thankfully. He's a little dizzy, a little unsteady, and very hungry, but he manages to pull on some clean sweat pants and a baggy t-shirt— a much plainer outfit than he normally allows himself to be seen in— and makes his way back downstairs.
He looks better now, from that alone. There's a little more color in his face, the blood's all gone, and he was careful to avoid his bandaging in the shower, so there aren't any issues of him bleeding through. His eyes trail for a long moment over the newly cleaned entranceway, and he breathes in slowly as he trudges towards the kitchen, where he assumes he can find Bakugo.
It might make sense for him to go straight for food, and he'll try his best to, but first— first he's going to approach Bakugo, wherever he is, and drape himself obnoxiously over his shoulders. It's a hug. Not a very tight one, because he's worried that even as injured as he is, Bakugo might throw him off, but. Take this wordless hug, punk...
He's not sure if he's ever initiated a hug before, but he's trying his hardest not to think about that right now. )
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Date: 1/22/25 01:22 (UTC)Bakugo pops the lid off the broth and takes a small spoon to its clarified surface. One soft puff of air cools it for a taste test. Tsk, bland as fuck in his opinion. Probably because it's not flaming hot; Esikko doesn't need his guts turning to lava when he's trying to digest something nice. Steam cuts off under lid once more and he crouches down on the balls of his feet, red eyes peering into a lit oven. The roast probably has a few more minutes.
One hand on the stove rim pulls him up, a knee popping for whatever reason, and Bakugo returns to the fridge for a drink. Esikko would probably want hot chocolate, but in his state, he needs as much iron as possible, to help his blood loss, not a shit ton of sugar.
He's just finished taking the roast out of the oven, a dark rusty colored mound of spiraling lines glistening with savory juice amid an aroma of mealy potato and scant spices. Faint hints of "other" wander amid the main scent, contributed by the bits and pieces of Esikko's leftovers sprinkled so nimbly within and now suspended among the mashed starches. He might have made a glaze to go along with this if he wasn't focused on the stock-based sou-
... oy. Why the fuck is Esikko glomping him like some grade-school kid? A tall as fuck grade-school kid. Luckily he wasn't carrying anything hot or sharp, dammit! Bakugo glares over his shoulder, lip quivering in a warning snarl. But... tch, he lets him have it for a little while. Just a little while.]
You need to eat.
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Date: 1/22/25 05:43 (UTC)I feel sick, though.
( It's true, but of course he's going to try to eat. He knows that it should help with that feeling, too...
And so he heads to peer at what's been made, eyes scanning quietly over the food for a long moment before, out of nowhere, he asks: )
Would you like a room here?
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Date: 1/22/25 17:25 (UTC)Bacon will fight flowers all day.
Bakugo himself isn't very clean right now. He's washed his arms, face, and neck before doing any food work, but his front's splattered and soaked. Good thing Esikko's hugging his back.]
Then take it slow.
[Feeling sick isn't a promise of being sick. Bakugo lets Esikko look over the food on the stovetop, taking the time to grab a plate from the cabinet.]
I'll think about it.
[Living off someone else's graces bothers his pride, but he also opened his suite to others during the swapped month.]
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Date: 1/24/25 05:26 (UTC)( Quietly, he serves himself a tiny amount, trying to be modest so less goes to waste. That's not a habit picked up in the palace at all, of course— but one he had to adapt to when out on the road, on the run. He hasn't even realized it's carried over to this place. )
I don't use the kitchen, either, other than to heat certain ingredients for my potions... So if you do decide it, there's a room for you and space in the common areas like that.
( He sits at the table with a quiet little sigh from the effort of it all, but does immediately try to start eating. Slowly... It helps that Bakugo made it tasty. )
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Date: 1/24/25 17:29 (UTC)[He'll reach a top rank on his own, even if he has to put himself out of his comfort zone a million times. This fucking place isn't going to break him down. He'll do it on his own terms, at his own pace, with people he wants to, without the shitty House's influence! Then he'll use his power to give it a blazing middle finger.
Kind of like what Esikko is doing right now, but Bakugo's got pride issues.
He ladles a little bowl of soup out for the prince, letting him cut himself a piece of the false roast. Despite being mostly potatoes, it cuts firm enough as if it's a solid piece. Even if Esikko's only taking a small slice of the butt. Luckily Bakugo thinks the man's taking measured portions so he can gauge if he's gonna puke or not.
But he needs the food regardless.]
I'm gonna rank down.
[It comes out quiet and curt. He's only talked to one other person about his decision when it comes to ranks. Most people don't speak about it and he figures there's a reason for that. But considering the conversations he's had about ranks and suits over the past several months, Bakugo's theorized a gamble's worth it.]
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Date: 1/28/25 05:48 (UTC)And he has to think about how to best word this so that Bakugo can get the hint without it being explicit, without it risking his own standing. So after a couple of mouthfuls of roast and stew, he speaks. )
That's a good idea. A test like that... you should let those you trust know. A handful of them, at least, if you have that many.
( Blatant encouragement, seemingly baseless, and the suggestion to spread knowledge of what he's about to do before he does it. It would still work the same, right? So long as he doesn't mention it retroactively... )
But my offer will stay the same. I'm the one indebted to you, anyway. And I don't enjoy that feeling.
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Date: 1/28/25 20:03 (UTC)He's even speculated, if this is the right path, the House would issue some sort of gag order to prevent it from getting out. Something he's begrudgingly respected by only bringing this up with people he trusts implicitly. And even that's usually vague and quick. So when Esikko respond with his own meandering comment, Bakugo accepts it with a grunt and little else.]
Tch. Who I wanna tell anything's my fucking business.
[Considering he told Esikko... the prince can take that as he wants. Bakugo's already done so. Not as keen to spread the knowledge, considering the hypothetical gag and the House's petty nature. He worked it out by himself, with his own research and questions! Other people can do the same. Hmph. Besides, anyone rank 5 or higher really has no need to know.]
You ever find me bleeding out on the floor, handle it and we're even.
[Patching someone up isn't equal trade to suddenly gaining a sugar daddy.]
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Date: 1/29/25 08:13 (UTC)( It's an instant sort of retort, annoyed as it is soft, but Esikko immediately feels ashamed at letting any sort of implication of his own loneliness slip through like that. So he shoves another bite of loaf into his mouth, even if he's finding it difficult to chew, difficult to want to eat anything, and stares down at the soup with tired eyes.
At least trying to rank down will be worth it. If it's a puzzle like the one he got, he expects Bakugo would be the type to be able to handle it. It wasn't complex at all. )
...It's the Divinity, by the way. The cause for this. The curse of a god, you know... My body has been weak since birth, so having this eating away at it only causes that poor health of mine to decline faster. It's this sort of cycle that ends in the Divinity trying to eat away at me completely.
( He's eaten a bit, at least, but he has to put down his silverware now with a quiet sigh. )
I think it wants to use my body like soil, to be reborn. I don't know, since it kills me in the end, anyway. Those potions are my attempts at postponing it while I look for a more permanent solution.
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Date: 1/30/25 00:00 (UTC)[As someone who recently changed ranks himself, again, Esikko's had his hand in the shifting levels of their stupid social scale. He's also pissed off the House before. Bakugo hasn't forgotten that damn branding the prince sported a while ago. Like hell is he going to get the guy involved more than he needs to be. The prince knows his plan and Bakugo can already tell Esikko's thought about this before. Maybe even knows more, but still kept shit vague.
Enough of that. He reaches across the table and pinches the plate rim to drag it over, out of reach. No more for him. Before his jaw locks up, or worse, his stomach rejects everything. Esikko's eaten enough for Bakugo's satisfaction. The rest can go in the fridge for reheating later.]
Try to finish the soup. You'll need liquid. [Having lost so much blood already. ] Don't guzzle it.
[In case Esikko thought he had to cram that down his throat too. Take his time, sip when he feels less nauseous, rest when he's balancing on the edge of blowing chunks. Gross. Bakugo pushes his chair out and heads for the stove to handle the leftovers.]
Divinity, huh... [Getting a glimpse into Esikko's mysterious affliction. He was curious, but avoided demanding more information unless it was necessary. Though he did snarl at the prince to tell him once he felt better.] Is that the price you had to pay for resetting your life? Or something that took the opportunity to latch on?
[A deal with the devil or some dumb schmuck who got unlucky.]
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Date: 2/2/25 06:40 (UTC)( He realizes, with a frown, that it's hard to explain how the timelines all blend together in his mind. How the first time and this current time feel so wildly different and yet the same, how his emotions always seem stuck on this same track, how no matter how wildly he flails he can never seem to get himself off of it.
He pokes at the soup with his spoon a few times, clearly trying to find the will to take another sip. But first: ) If you'd like another opinion, you could ask that ex-bodyguard of mine. Kirma.
( The same one he'd complained to Bakugo about plenty of times, who'd kidnapped him. But also the same he killed some time back, who was apparently alive again and ignoring him. He does another particularly annoyed stab at his soup before lifting the spoon to his mouth this time, taking a slow sip. )
He's always so opinionated on my business, but maybe he's right.
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Date: 2/3/25 23:36 (UTC)[Esikko's reveal sounds completely ridiculous, even though Bakugo's at least come to accept the other man's not lying. Gods and magic don't exist in his world beyond traditional Japanese beliefs that many people have mostly left behind outside of ceremonies, holidays, and other, well, traditions. But he's not here to judge Esikko's world. Albeit snarking at the other man for making some shit choices in his opinion.]
And the god you ate? Doesn't sound like it gets a do over in life.
[Is this pity? Hell no! But bluntly pointing out, if it's true, Esikko murdered someone else all for the sake of trying to give himself a better life, screw what it cost the person he slaughtered. Bakugo isn't gonna blame the god for giving Esikko the worst case of indigestion/food poisoning known to man in revenge.]
Tch, the guy you've said nothing but shit about? Pass.
[At this point in time, the hero's liable to punch the dog out rather than listen to anything he has to say. He doesn't really know about the "killed him" part yet. Or he's been told Esikko did it in self defense. He finishes packing up the soup in a container and slots it in the fridge.]
A bodyguard should know what he's getting himself into, Prince Prick.
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Date: 2/4/25 03:50 (UTC)That god was a flower. Gods in our world are concepts more than anything else. This was lone flower blooming on a mountain top.
( It's the same language he always speaks, with Peacock's translation picking it up as always, but there's something foreign sounding in the name beyond even that.
He feels himself getting sick again, so he lays his spoon down, staring into the reflections of the broth. )
I hate him, but there's also a reason I've stuck by him until now. But... maybe part of me just wishes he'd run into someone who could see past his innocent demeanor to the twisted ego he really has.
( Now, he sighs, rubbing at his temples like that might help. )
I'm talking too much.
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Date: 2/4/25 04:07 (UTC)Doesn't answer the question.
[Translation or weird tone or not, the words don't do anything to address what Bakugo was getting at. Taken at face value, it makes the entire ordeal sound worse, picking on a lone creature struggling to survive, or consuming something that alone had managed to surpass all odds and live in a place it shouldn't have been able to.
Bakugo notes the way Esikko puts his spoon down and comes by to take the bowl and the spoon away before the man can force himself to try another sip. That's enough for now. No point in making hi puke.]
You told me you haven't been around him for fucking months, Prince Prick.
[During the painting copy fiasco, even earlier than that, Esikko made it sound like he wasn't dealing with the dog anymore. Was that a lie?]
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Date: 2/4/25 04:18 (UTC)( He sighs, but allows his hands to drop away from his own face. Instead, he watches Bakugo gather things up with a twitch of a small frown. It bothers him, to sit here, to barely be able to hold down food, to have been saved and fed and not even be able to make it up in any significant way.
But he knows getting up would only make it worse, so he curls his fingers into his palms and stays out. )
I have been trying to deal with him less, yes. We no longer live together, but he finds me in my room, in the hallways, while I'm out. He's an annoying dog.
This is even his old suite.
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Date: 2/4/25 05:08 (UTC)[Though technically, someone's "life" basically includes their entire world, so yeah. That's logical. Still sounds like a ridiculous piece of magic for one person to randomly stumble across.
Bakugo finishes up the leftovers, roast slices layers nicely in the container, and caps the glass with its silicone lid. Into the fridge with the soup. The remains in Esikko's bowl... down the sink. Normally he'd bitch at someone for wasting food, but there's barely five spoonfuls left. The guy did well enough with what he had.
As for Esikko's guilt... that's his burden. Bakugo's not nice enough to comfort someone for shooting himself in the foot. At least the prince isn't pitching a fit.]
Hmph. [Maybe he heard wrong, but Bakugo was under the impression Esikko had no further dealings with someone who abused him. But this isn't his business.] With your rank now, you can order the staff to take him away, or get a fucking restraining order.
[With the ability to wield the glories of the Hotel to his liking, any interaction Esikko has with someone he doesn't want to have interactions with, is on him.
As for being in the guy's suite... well that's just gross.]
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Date: 2/7/25 01:34 (UTC)( Because time is weird, timelines are weird, universes... It's a little like being in the Peacock, actually.
But he considers the other words. True, he has his rank now, and that seems to be ahead of even the TRANSGRESSOR mark that's still so permanently etched into his neck. Most staff will still listen to him, despite that, though he'll get sideeyes and questions on occasion... But.
But is it that simple?
Are any toxic relationships simple?)...I'm aware of that, at least. I suppose it makes sense that you wouldn't want to hear my complaints, if I'm the one allowing any possibility for these things to happen. ( His hair is starting to dry now, its usual waves, and he runs his fingers through a lock of it quietly. ) But I don't hate everything.
And I suppose it would feel strange, or empty, to completely turn away from someone who has always been there. Who I had focused on when there was nothing else to focus on? ( He doesn't know how to explain it. ) And after all I've done to him, I guess a part of me feels it must just be the repayment that's deserved.
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Date: 2/7/25 03:19 (UTC)[Yeah, it's difficult to explain, but Bakugo's also a superpower nerd, SECRETLY, so this has a morbid interest despite the topic being pretty wrong in many ways.
Most things fall apart when you start talking about time travel. Rules have to be established and held rigidly or everything starts to break up with a flurry of "what if's" and "why didn't you's" all over.
Kind of odd an Ace rank would still have that mark on his neck, but he guesses the Peacock holds grudges hard. Then again, the Ace rank is kind of screwy compared to all the others. Bit of a wildcard at times.
Toxic relationships are both simple and complex. Simple in that if you're in one, get the fuck out. Complex in that it's not so easy. The latter of which Bakugo simply can't understand because he's never been in one.]
Would you wanna listen to someone whine after you watched them shoot their own foot?
[It's less a dismiss to Esikko and more trying to get him to realize he can control his own decisions.]
Never said you did.
[Even though later Esikko will said everything about him's infuriating. MAKE UP YOUR MIND, MAN!!]
You've done to him? All you've ever said is what he's done to you.
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Date: 2/7/25 03:31 (UTC)But I severed that chain here. It's odd, since I always thought he hated me for setting it up in the first place— but he was sad, when I did.
( Obviously it's not a literal chain he's talking about here. Like an invisible chain between souls, forcing them both to always end up back together somehow. Like, a manmade red string of fate, in a dark, twisted sort of way...?
Esikko looks like he's not pleased with himself for it, at least. )
That painting-me was so angry that I had done that. And it made me wonder, for the first time... if the "me" of any past was really "me."
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Date: 2/7/25 05:19 (UTC)Kirma being from Esikko's world is... well... Esikko probably told him that before, but it never clicked until now. He thought it was some crazy bastard from the hotel that ended up being a problem.]
Has anyone told you you're a fucking idiot?
[Dragging someone else in this stupid resetting spell. Cannibalizing a god. Shackling himself to someone who's abusive and yet both of them are apparently codependent on each other. Then breaking it off here after six or seven lifetimes together.]
Sounds like the only thing that stays the same in all your lives is that you ultimately don't like your life.
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Date: 2/8/25 05:40 (UTC)( At the table, Esikko fidgets with his own hands, cold fingertips pressing into the palm of the opposite, eyes tracing the way his skin takes time to fill the color back in. )
But I think the problem is that I do. Not the details, not what happens, not how it ends, of course— but it would be much easier to die and be free of it all. But I can't think that way.
( He can't be like Aventurine, who came to him begging for death, who used him like a tool to get it. He can't be like Kirma, who gives in and lets death happen again and again. It has him wondering if that's how it should be, for him. )
What bothers me the most is that there's not enough time for me to continue trying. Resetting is the closest thing I can manage.
( Another press of his palm, a squeeze, a distracted dig of his own fingernails to try and distract from how stupid he feels sharing this. )
Here, though, it's different, isn't it? People are brought back in an entirely different way. If I can find a way to manage this curse, maybe I can simply... keep living. For a while. Even if I have to die once or twice first, if I don't forget my precious memories, then it's entirely different, you know?
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Date: 2/10/25 02:47 (UTC)[He's not asking for clarification. Esikko's the only one who knows if his dislike for his own life is either apparent or truthful. Bakugo's not here to dig into it. He pushes off the counter and tugs open the freezer to grab some ice from the tray. Then shuts the door and soon deposits the cubes into a glass from the cabinet. Water follows.
He lowers the glass after a drink.]
You're the one who trapped yourself in an unending cycle.
[Of course he can't think that way; as far as Bakugo knows, the curse is endless. Hard to know now if Esikko knew the magic he tampered with would result in such a thing or if he was a foolish moron dabbling in shit beyond his understanding.
He frowns at the second part. In one way, it makes sense; in another...]
You're one of the few who have unlimited tries. How the hell is that not enough time?
[Esikko might feel stupid sharing it, but Bakugo's trying to connect all the dots and feeling he isn't succeeding as much as he wants. The prince ends with "you know?" and the blonde gives him a flat look over the glass' rim.]
Nope.
[He does not fucking know at all.]
You haven't died in the Peacock yet. Either from your curse, another guest, or House related shit.
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Date: 2/10/25 07:05 (UTC)( He pushes himself up from the table, finally, a little steadier on his feet than he had been going up to the shower. He still looks too pale, and his eyes look heavier than usual, but all things considered, he's doing much better. )
I haven't died yet, but I nearly did, and I've seen people who have. They don't bring you back as a newborn, they bring you back with something... wrong, in some other way. So I'm just saying... I'd keep my memories, unlike all these other times back home. Some of those are still lost.
( He sighs. )
I know you must not think I should simply die and accept it, or you wouldn't have saved me, so forget all of this for now. Can I just ask... Someone told me about that "speed dial" thing. Can I add you to mine?
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