( It's there that Esikko gets even quieter, fingers touching to his own lips in thought. He's staring at nothing, right now, thinking, doubting, wondering— it's easy to relive that day, the moments leading up to it. The request, the deal, the blood, the unfair anger that followed— )
He was killed. ( He asked to be. I was there. I'm the one who did it. Any of the additions he wants to add on bounce around in his head too wildly, and he finds himself struggling, eyes shifting to the side, remembering. )
Bakugo, ( he's soft now, letting his hand fall away from his mouth as he looks over ) would you call us friends?
[A pregnant silence, one filled with unknown emotions weighing on Esikko. He can almost feel them on the man's shoulders, invisible gremlins clinging to his skin. Is nothing in this guy's life positive? One tragedy after another. Bakugo frowns at the ceiling, eyes narrowing in a grumpy expression that doubles in thoughtful reflection.]
I see. [No further detail. There've been plenty of times he's answered questions similarly. Cut off, topic closed, refusing to let more out even if someone tried to dig.
It's the follow up that makes his brows furrow more.
What the hell? After this fucking row, all the prince said and yelled at him for, assaulted him without permission, petty petty, he's going to ask something like that?! As Bakugo's sifting the impression Esikko is more of a villain now? Real smart decision, man...
Bakugo closes most of his emotions off, showing only what he wants, and is otherwise brooding, stoic, and aloof despite his usual explosive temperament. But he's not unfeeling.]
( He understands that sort of response. Understands the irritation, the hesitance. But he half expects a change of heart for that reason alone, to be pushed back just because his own views surfaced a little more, like so many others do. It's fear, he thinks, that has him staring at Bakugo, trying and failing to read through his expression. His face falters a little, a frown sneaking in as he turns half away again. )
I don't know... How should I know? It's not as if I... ( have friends? ) I mean. I thought so.
( His words are still quiet, frustrated, though this time at himself, and he blinks a few times extra at his own hands to busy himself, running his thumb over the long-healed burn mark on his opposite palm. )
I just thought that if someone like you could say it, then you'd actually mean it. Am I wrong?
[There's a very emotional high right now, and it's not a positive thing. He's been through a lot in the Peacock, having to deal with being kidnapped again, forced into a situation far outside his comfort, unable to get home, and among all of that shit, told to interact and bond with people. Events designed to pry his thoughts and feelings out of his mouth, endangering people around him as well as himself, and generally fucking with him (all of them). All through that, he met people and interacted with them. Does he consider any of them friends?
Friends is a strange word for Bakugo. He thinks it's "weak" when you admit it. The idea of "friends" giving you strength is a stupid trope he walked into U.A. not believing in. I can handle this myself! Sharing his victories with someone else, earning a defeat because some other bastard interfered, being "with" another person like that bothers him a lot. And yet, he's not immune to it. Friendship can happen, he's human after all, but it takes a lot of effort, patience, experience, and most of all, Bakugo's opinion on the other person.
After what he's been through with Esikko... Does that make them friends?]
If I say it, of course I fucking mean it. I'm not some damn liar.
[The couch sighs as he pushes himself off it and onto his feet. Saying it, however, has always been the problem. He'll deny it even if it's true, because that's the kind of person he is. Embarrassing, frustrating, whatever.]
I trust you as an ally.
[In all honesty, they probably are budding on that verge of friendship, as Bakugo would rather be with Esikko during some events rather than be stuck with someone new. Familiarity's important.]
You already have friends anyways.
[Hiyori and Dabi to name two off the top of his head.]
( Esikko looks conflicted, or confused, eventually dropping his hands from their fidgeting. This place has certainly provided new opportunities, and so he does have... a friend? Friends? Dabi has been there through everything, knows who he really is. Hiyori, though, he still worries would change his mind instantly the second he learned more about him, and leave him behind.
Right now, he feels like Bakugo might be in that same grouping. Friendship has always seemed weak to him, too. Unneeded, a distraction, an obstacle— though how much of that was from just not having any for himself? The truth is, he's afraid of trusting people only to have them turn their back on him.
It's not fair, he thinks, that he can feel sick over something like this. Even Dabi had said he expected specific answers from people— was that true? Is he unreasonable? He just doesn't want to be alone. )
Sorry. ( Mumbled and a little distracted, he ultimately decides not to do the trust fall of showing Bakugo the messages from Aventurine. Not now, anyway. But he looks frustrated with himself as he rubs at his forehead a little and turns to move towards the front door. )
I must be tired, is all. ( to get so worked up, so emotional. )
[For Esikko, probably. People who talk to him, who help him with troubles, who come to him when he struggles, who like to be around him, talk with him about random or serious things, people who he can trust with burdens or joys. Those people are friends. Does he really have to have it spelled out for him who's a friend and who isn't? Bakugo doesn't know who Esikko has in his life that fits those criteria, but he's pretty damn sure he has people.
Bakugo didn't come to this place to make friends. Hell, he never wanted to fucking come here in the first place! They're all prisoners; no one said they had to get along or interact. (Minus the damn House saying exactly that.) Friends, relying on people, admitting he needs helps... fuck it. He's not that weak.
If Esikko expected some kind of better answer more aligned to what he wants to hear... well that's not been happening the entire damn time has it. Bakugo doesn't even know if they've reached whatever they were trying to reach.]
The hell are you apologizing for? [Esikko didn't do anything wrong except stand up for his friend's feelings. Bakugo follows him to the door, not bothering to chase after the excuse of being tired. Let him say what he wants. He unlocks the front door and pushes it open.]
I'll leave the statues here. [He tilts his head to the hallway outside his suite door.] Tell Bacon Face he can come get them whenever he wants.
( Now that brightens things a little more, actually. Actions like that— they speak for trust even more than words do, right? He knows it can't be easy, to rely on anyone else to look after something when you're the one who feels most able to protect them. So, his smile is a little more honest in turn, even if he still feels weirdly scrambled over getting emotional about things. It's gross. )
...Thanks, I will. Sincerely, you know. I've thanked you more than once for various things, but it's not something I pass out so easily. Just so you know.
( So. Friends, maybe, almost? Allies, he guesses, can be fine for now. They're both stubborn in their own ways. Anyway— reaching into his pockets, he pulls out a few vials that likely look familiar to Bakugo. The potions for burn fixes and pain mediation, the ones he'd given the next day after promising before— they're the same, labeled and everything. )
I thought you might be running low.
( He was going to just leave them by the door, but since he followed anyway... Now he heads out, unless there's anything else Bakugo wants to say. )
[Bakugo hates losing. He's always been sore about it. But he's also not so proud he can't admit to himself when something was done wrong. If he thinks of this more as wronging Touya rather than Dabi, at least it makes the ire of doing this for a villain less stinging. There are so many things Esikko doesn't know, so many things he could tell the guy about his friend, about the men whose images those statues bear... But the time to do that has passed and he decided against it.]
Scram.
[Is this something to thank him for? He doesn't know. Parts of this feel weird, others settled, parts of him irked, others calmer. Right now, he simply wants it to be done with. Before he changes his mind.
Bakugo takes the vials offered to him, looking at the collection in his hand. Hmph, so he remembered. A few more words and Esikko might have need some burn heal before he left. Ironic. Curling his fingers, he pockets the offering. Low? No, but he'll take them for stock. You never know what'll happen.
He waits by the door until Esikko is safely on the elevator and out of sight, then closes the suite to make good on his word. Lessons learned, huh...]
( He's scramming, he's going...!! Onto the elevator and out of sight, already tapping on his Watch once he's inside to share the news with Dabi.
He'll remember this, though. An act of kindness is what he described it as, considering his own behavior up until that point. It was surprising. It was nice. Maybe something like a truce? And it sounds like Dabi has a truce of his own, in not taking both. So Esikko is left heavily relieved, and with the mind that... maybe he needs to thank Bakugo a little better, some time.
He'll think on that on his own. He hears that you give gifts around this time of year, here, anyway. )
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 12/18/24 06:16 (UTC)( It's there that Esikko gets even quieter, fingers touching to his own lips in thought. He's staring at nothing, right now, thinking, doubting, wondering— it's easy to relive that day, the moments leading up to it. The request, the deal, the blood, the unfair anger that followed— )
He was killed. ( He asked to be. I was there. I'm the one who did it. Any of the additions he wants to add on bounce around in his head too wildly, and he finds himself struggling, eyes shifting to the side, remembering. )
Bakugo, ( he's soft now, letting his hand fall away from his mouth as he looks over ) would you call us friends?
no subject
Date: 12/18/24 06:39 (UTC)I see. [No further detail. There've been plenty of times he's answered questions similarly. Cut off, topic closed, refusing to let more out even if someone tried to dig.
It's the follow up that makes his brows furrow more.
What the hell? After this fucking row, all the prince said and yelled at him for, assaulted him
without permission, petty petty, he's going to ask something like that?! As Bakugo's sifting the impression Esikko is more of a villain now? Real smart decision, man...Bakugo closes most of his emotions off, showing only what he wants, and is otherwise brooding, stoic, and aloof despite his usual explosive temperament. But he's not unfeeling.]
What do you think?
no subject
Date: 12/18/24 06:59 (UTC)I don't know... How should I know? It's not as if I... ( have friends? ) I mean. I thought so.
( His words are still quiet, frustrated, though this time at himself, and he blinks a few times extra at his own hands to busy himself, running his thumb over the long-healed burn mark on his opposite palm. )
I just thought that if someone like you could say it, then you'd actually mean it. Am I wrong?
no subject
Date: 12/18/24 16:43 (UTC)Friends is a strange word for Bakugo. He thinks it's "weak" when you admit it. The idea of "friends" giving you strength is a stupid trope he walked into U.A. not believing in. I can handle this myself! Sharing his victories with someone else, earning a defeat because some other bastard interfered, being "with" another person like that bothers him a lot. And yet, he's not immune to it. Friendship can happen, he's human after all, but it takes a lot of effort, patience, experience, and most of all, Bakugo's opinion on the other person.
After what he's been through with Esikko... Does that make them friends?]
If I say it, of course I fucking mean it. I'm not some damn liar.
[The couch sighs as he pushes himself off it and onto his feet. Saying it, however, has always been the problem. He'll deny it even if it's true, because that's the kind of person he is. Embarrassing, frustrating, whatever.]
I trust you as an ally.
[In all honesty, they probably are budding on that verge of friendship, as Bakugo would rather be with Esikko during some events rather than be stuck with someone new. Familiarity's important.]
You already have friends anyways.
[Hiyori and Dabi to name two off the top of his head.]
no subject
Date: 12/18/24 18:17 (UTC)( Esikko looks conflicted, or confused, eventually dropping his hands from their fidgeting. This place has certainly provided new opportunities, and so he does have... a friend? Friends? Dabi has been there through everything, knows who he really is. Hiyori, though, he still worries would change his mind instantly the second he learned more about him, and leave him behind.
Right now, he feels like Bakugo might be in that same grouping. Friendship has always seemed weak to him, too. Unneeded, a distraction, an obstacle— though how much of that was from just not having any for himself? The truth is, he's afraid of trusting people only to have them turn their back on him.
It's not fair, he thinks, that he can feel sick over something like this. Even Dabi had said he expected specific answers from people— was that true? Is he unreasonable? He just doesn't want to be alone. )
Sorry. ( Mumbled and a little distracted, he ultimately decides not to do the trust fall of showing Bakugo the messages from Aventurine. Not now, anyway. But he looks frustrated with himself as he rubs at his forehead a little and turns to move towards the front door. )
I must be tired, is all. ( to get so worked up, so emotional. )
no subject
Date: 12/18/24 20:04 (UTC)[For Esikko, probably. People who talk to him, who help him with troubles, who come to him when he struggles, who like to be around him, talk with him about random or serious things, people who he can trust with burdens or joys. Those people are friends. Does he really have to have it spelled out for him who's a friend and who isn't? Bakugo doesn't know who Esikko has in his life that fits those criteria, but he's pretty damn sure he has people.
Bakugo didn't come to this place to make friends. Hell, he never wanted to fucking come here in the first place! They're all prisoners; no one said they had to get along or interact. (Minus the damn House saying exactly that.) Friends, relying on people, admitting he needs helps... fuck it. He's not that weak.
If Esikko expected some kind of better answer more aligned to what he wants to hear... well that's not been happening the entire damn time has it. Bakugo doesn't even know if they've reached whatever they were trying to reach.]
The hell are you apologizing for? [Esikko didn't do anything wrong except stand up for his friend's feelings. Bakugo follows him to the door, not bothering to chase after the excuse of being tired. Let him say what he wants. He unlocks the front door and pushes it open.]
I'll leave the statues here. [He tilts his head to the hallway outside his suite door.] Tell Bacon Face he can come get them whenever he wants.
I don't need to meet with him anymore.
no subject
Date: 12/18/24 20:21 (UTC)...Thanks, I will. Sincerely, you know. I've thanked you more than once for various things, but it's not something I pass out so easily. Just so you know.
( So. Friends, maybe, almost? Allies, he guesses, can be fine for now. They're both stubborn in their own ways. Anyway— reaching into his pockets, he pulls out a few vials that likely look familiar to Bakugo. The potions for burn fixes and pain mediation, the ones he'd given the next day after promising before— they're the same, labeled and everything. )
I thought you might be running low.
( He was going to just leave them by the door, but since he followed anyway... Now he heads out, unless there's anything else Bakugo wants to say. )
no subject
Date: 12/18/24 20:45 (UTC)Scram.
[Is this something to thank him for? He doesn't know. Parts of this feel weird, others settled, parts of him irked, others calmer. Right now, he simply wants it to be done with. Before he changes his mind.
Bakugo takes the vials offered to him, looking at the collection in his hand. Hmph, so he remembered. A few more words and Esikko might have need some burn heal before he left. Ironic. Curling his fingers, he pockets the offering. Low? No, but he'll take them for stock. You never know what'll happen.
He waits by the door until Esikko is safely on the elevator and out of sight, then closes the suite to make good on his word. Lessons learned, huh...]
no subject
Date: 12/18/24 22:16 (UTC)He'll remember this, though. An act of kindness is what he described it as, considering his own behavior up until that point. It was surprising. It was nice. Maybe something like a truce? And it sounds like Dabi has a truce of his own, in not taking both. So Esikko is left heavily relieved, and with the mind that... maybe he needs to thank Bakugo a little better, some time.
He'll think on that on his own. He hears that you give gifts around this time of year, here, anyway. )